Ego, Attention, and Alignment

The Paradox of Ego

It’s easy to point at another and say, “That’s your ego speaking.”  Yet in doing so, often it is our own ego speaking—the part of us that wants to judge, prove, or feel superior.

If we were purely the observer, we wouldn’t need to argue or label; we would simply watch. This shows the paradox of ego: it critiques itself while being the very thing doing the critiquing.

But ego is not an enemy—it is a tool. When unaligned, it drives chaos, pride, and control. When aligned, it becomes a noble companion that helps us live with love, compassion, and higher purpose.

My Story of Alignment

For almost 40 years, I didn’t really understand what the ego was. I thought I was just living my life, chasing goals, trying to make things work. But over time, I realized the ego was the driving factor behind everything I did.

And when the ego isn’t aligned—when it’s not guided by the heart (emotions) and the spirit (wise voice within) —everything eventually falls apart.

The Horse and Rider

I like to think of the ego as a horse. For years, my horse ran wild, dragging me wherever it wanted. I kept falling into the mud. At other times, I tried to beat the horse into submission, and that only made things worse.

It wasn’t until I began training the horse with patience and love that things started changing. With alignment, the ego became a companion. Instead of fighting me, it carried me. The rider is the observer; the horse is the ego. Together, they can travel far—if they are in harmony.

Flow and Trust

There are moments when the ego stops fighting and simply trusts the process. That’s what people call the flow state. I’ve felt it: when I focus deeply on a task, know the variables, and let go of the need to control everything, suddenly everything just clicks.

The ego isn’t gone in those moments—it’s serving alignment. It’s doing the task with presence, not with pride.

The Trap of Money

For a long time, my ego told me that money was the solution to every problem. My mind chased it, convinced that if I just had enough, things would finally work out.

But little did I realize that money, if it only feeds the ego, can actually make things worse. It can become fuel for pride, fear, and emptiness. I learned that what you do must have a heart behind it. If you’re doing something only for money, nothing truly gets done.

When I heard of an old Kabbalistic teaching:

• If will comes before love, it leads to destruction.

• If will comes after love, it leads to creation and harmony.

That was a turning point for me. My actions had to come through love, not before it.

Attention, Attention, Attention

The old masters spoke about attention—and not just once, but three times. Attention of the mind, attention of the body, and attention of the heart.

• The mind’s attention directs thought and focus, keeping it from scattering into fear and control.

• The body’s attention grounds presence through breath, movement, and sensation.

• The heart’s attention aligns everything with compassion, love, and meaning.
  

When these three attentions come together, energy flows coherently. Life no longer feels like juggling problems. It becomes aligned, purposeful, and whole.

The Shift

The path isn’t easy, but it’s not as hard as I once thought. Alignment makes the effort natural—like swimming with the current instead of against it.

In my youth, I thought I had to shout for attention, compete, win, prove my existence. But all of that was pride. Now I see: true presence doesn’t come from demanding attention. It comes from giving attention—to what I do, to those around me, to the spirit that guides me.

That is alignment. That is the way forward.